Step We Are On: Four
Page: 70
Chapter: 5 "How It Works"
Subject: Resentment Inventory, Fear, Self-reliance, Trust, Sex
Good morning. We are going through the columns of the 4th step directions. We are looking at sex and learning how sex problems…….are problematic; in that, they can be as much a part of self-centered behaviors and cause harm to others as other human activities. Today we continue to look at some truths about sex, as the co-authors viewed it.
- Are all people, reasonable and in agreement with respect to their views on sexuality?
We realize that some people are as fanatical about sex as others are loose.
Fanatic - wildly extravagant in opinion or view, generally about religion.~ The Winston Simplified Dictionary – 1938
Loose – lax in principles, unstable morally.~ The Winston Simplified Dictionary – 1938
They are letting readers know they are aware and have considered the gamut of attitude regarding sex among folks. They are not taking a position at either end of that spectrum in this book. They are simply noting that religious folks usually take and extravagant view and those unprincipled will disregard morals altogether.
- What do we avoid?
We avoid hysterical thinking or advice.
Hysterical - Violently emotional.~ The Winston Simplified Dictionary – 1938
A spiritually awakened and God conscious "sponsor" will not be guided by emotions because he will be free from the bondage of self – the “Self” that feeds upon the energy of emotional involvement will not ‘speak’.
His neutrality will permit the proffering of advice that is loving and not prejudiced by the bitter experiences of his own dysfunctional sex life, because he will have had his sex problems solved.
A God-conscious, spiritually awakened person is someone a protégée can trust for sexual advice, whenever a sponsor who still suffers from sexual misconduct, and immoral behavior can only give immoral “advice”, causing further harms.
His neutrality will permit the proffering of advice that is loving and not prejudiced by the bitter experiences of his own dysfunctional sex life, because he will have had his sex problems solved.
A God-conscious, spiritually awakened person is someone a protégée can trust for sexual advice, whenever a sponsor who still suffers from sexual misconduct, and immoral behavior can only give immoral “advice”, causing further harms.
There are sponsors who advise protégées to “Get Laid," even out of wedlock, even to seek prostitutes, illicit massage therapists or encourage, “zipless” encounters (women mostly) as a hedge against drinking.
This begs the following question:
Is "sober at all cost" really a selfless, sound attitude for someone on a spiritual path to God?
This begs the following question:
Is "sober at all cost" really a selfless, sound attitude for someone on a spiritual path to God?
Comment: It has been a long-standing practice in our Fellowship to avoid giving advice unless we are that person’s sponsor. What we are directed to do is share our experience and knowledge of our program and how God does for us what we cannot do for ourselves.
- Did the co-authors pose the question of sexual immorality causing a relapse? Two sentences
Suppose we fall short of the chosen ideal and stumble? Does this mean we are going to get drunk?
- Does everyone think this is true?
Some people tell us so.
- Is it entirely false?
But this is only a half-truth
They agreed that it is true, but only partially.
Tomorrow, they continue onto the WHOLE truth about failing sexually.
Peace and Love,
Danny S – RLRA
Real Live Recovered Alcoholic
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