Page 36 - More About Alcoholism

WE ARE NOW ON PAGE 36
Page: 36

Step we are on: Step One

Subject: Mental Condition, Jim the Salesman, Insanity, Two Fold illness, Pre-lapse, Relapse, Normal vs. Abnormal

• How was Jim on Tuesday morning?

This is his story: "I came to work on Tuesday morning...

Comment: Would you wonder where he was on Monday morning? A lot of alcoholics are bad about Mondays, but in Jim's case, there is no need to worry about where he was on Monday because he must have been sober on Monday!

How can we can sure? Remember this is the co-author's account of a FIRST DRINK obsession. Had Jim been drinking prior to Tuesday then this would be a story depicting 'craving' (the succeeding drinks), and it is not. It is a First Drink, mental obsession depiction.

It is imperative we understand this separation between these two conditions - otherwise, we will convey incorrect information about "our description of the alcoholic". Please do not joke about Jim beginning Tuesday morning hung over from a Monday spree - to do so takes all the understanding out of describing alcoholism and contributes much confusion to an already very addled and myth damaged fellowship.

So Tuesday is the day of his "first drink' relapse insanity.

• What was the source of his irritation?

I remember I felt irritated that I had to be a salesman for a concern I once owned

Irritate – to provoke or make angry; fret; annoy, vex, excite, incense, exasperate, provoke, offend, tease. To irritate is to excite by anger, impatience, nervousness, or fretfulness, usually by something that grates on the sensibilities. We're irritated by being constantly crossed or nag, or by having to listen to harsh or necessary noise. -The Winston Simplified Dictionary – 1938


Jim has made yet another contribution to his internal store of resentments, (annoyances) which he will need to examine later when he moves on and finally takes the rest of these steps (especially the 4th Step Inventory.) Irritation, soreness, feeling 'burned up".

Today we are "pissed" peeved, annoyed, - many alcoholics who fail to enlarge their spiritual lives resort to secular 'anger management' to learn how to take charge of these forces rather than letting God manage them.

• Did he speak to his boss?

I had a few words with the boss, but nothing serious.

Things don’t necessarily have to be loud, heated explosions. It’s the little things too - the easily suppressed disagreements with our fellows DO count.

• What did he decide to do?

Then I decided to drive into the country and see one of my prospects for a car.

There's nothing like a good dose of self-installed esteem ('self-esteem') through accomplishments, fulfillment of ambitions - for a salesman it could be a sales commission. (Remember that next time you hear someone tell a newcomer to get a bubble bath as a solution for their restlessness, irritability or discontent) 

Question: What about 'self-esteem' tricks proposed in traditional, secular 'treatments' for alcoholism? Do those work for the real alcoholic? How about food, sex, massages, back-slapping, compliments, fellowship, volunteer work? Nicotine? Caffeine? DO these alcoholics offer any permanent solutions? These are ALL alcohol substitutes ---- numbing the pain of suppressed resentments, judgments, and soul sickness -- but do these offer any permanent solutions?

• Along the way, what happened?

On the way I felt hungry

• So, what did he do?

so I stopped at a roadside place where they have a bar.

It is important to realize here that Jim is NOT planning this drink. He has no thoughts of drinking whatsoever. It isn’t the thoughts of drinking that are the problem for the obsessed alcoholic. It is always the ones that were never seen coming. THIS is characteristic of the real alcoholic. Some people just WANT to drink themselves to oblivion and have no idea of what it is like to drink - even when they don't want to drink.

Some people think of a drink and they drink! They do that allot! Enough to give all the appearances of an alcoholic and yet THIS doesn’t make them alcoholic. Real alcoholics fail to think of a drink - then drink! No wonder we call it insanity.

We will continue with the rest of this episode over the weekend, as these points are addressed through Jim's Story, so please stay tuned.

TOMORROW:

• Did he stop for a drink?
• What did he think he would do?
• What else did he hope he might find?
• Was this place unfamiliar to him?
• Was he setting himself up for a slip by stopping there? ( Hint: "no")

Peace & Love,

Danny S -RLRA
Real Live Recovered Alcoholic

http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com